DSQUARED Leopard-Print Studded High-Top Sneakers: Can you un-see things?


As it’s mentioned in my About Me page, there are so many things in life at this point I’m not sure about. However, there’s this one thing I’m absolutely, positively sure about, which is I’m not what Dean and Dan of DSQUARED2 have in mind when they design. If you follow their shows, you’d most likely know whom their stuff is geared towards– tall, handsome, well-oiled six packs, sexy blah blah blah. In other words, Greek god incarnated. Here’s the concrete proof that I’m NOT bluffing you:

When-Cristiano-Ronaldo-Posed-Larger-Than-Life-AdOK, Cristiano is wearing DSQUARED jeans and sneakers. When Cristiano is not fully clad, he looks like that. I’m sorry that I’m not as good-looking and my body is not as hot. 

That’s not to say that there have never been instances when I didn’t drool over things DSQUARED. In fact, they consistently put out some of the most lust-worthy coats every season. Unfortunately, the images I have in my mind of those beautiful coats are not able to mitigate the petrifying effect that these leopard-print pony hair studded high-stop sneakers have on me.

Now, let’s not discuss the function part because they’re sneakers so they’re functional (as they should be), meaning you could walk miles and miles in them. But putting three of the toughest things to get right in men’s footwear (leopard print, metallic gold leather, gold tone studs) next to each other is abysmally tacky, if you ask me. And is it just me or the black laces only accentuate how each detail is at odds with the other and thus ugli-fy the entire thing?

To be complety honest with you all, if I had to sum this pair up in one adjective, eurotrashy would be it.

Perhaps because of all those crazy details, these sneakers come with a high-sky price tag of $850. But who am I to speak? I mean, if you have $850 flying around, then this pair of Leopard-Print Pony Hair Studded High-Top Sneakers are exclusively available on Saks Fifth Avenue.

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